Shamanic Pathways 07 - A wounded shaman(ist)?

[moonvoice]

In neo-shamanism, it has been bandied out - mistakenly - that a shamanist must experience illness, sickness or even death in order to be a shamanist or shaman. This has been bred out of the fact that in some (but not all) Indigenous cultures, a shaman could occasionally be hall-marked by the shaman's sickness, which could be mental or physical in origin; or the shaman's death. The idea being that should a shaman walk so close to the lands of the dead (or indeed, within them), s/he would be better qualified to heal those who were sick or dying or dead.

It's a sound theory, it makes sense, it's certainly true that experiencing chronic illness for most of your life gives you the potential to have a better understanding of others who are experiencing the same thing. The thing is, it's not universal. One does not need to be sick, or dying, or to have died, or whatever, in order to be a shamanist.

It's ironic that I make this argument (or perhaps disclaimer), because in many ways I am the epitome of the 'wounded shamanist.' The person who has died, experienced major surgeries, mental illnesses, chronic illnesses both diagnosed and undiagnosed (in fact, I'm still waiting on a camera endoscopy for the latter), childhood rape and torture not by one person, but by more than one.

I've been through more than the average Westerner.

Did my illnesses lead me to shamanism? It's hard to say. Certainly I looked for spiritual succour in order to survive. I learnt very early on of the monstrous nature of humanity that it could unleash itself upon its own species in the matter of childhood rape and torture. And instinctively I found my peace and harmony within nature. Even as a very young child, I would spend time with animals and plants to escape what I knew of the people around me.

But that could have led me anywhere. It is possible to find spiritual succour in any religion. It is possible to love nature even in religions that do not obviously tout love of nature.

It is, however, certainly true that shamanism offered me many practical and useful tools to address my illnesses with peace, acceptance, and understanding. Breath-work, soul retrieval, soul extraction, journeying, listening to teachers and those who are healing themselves, helping others to heal, aligning myself with helpful spirits and so on. That through my practices of shamanism, and my embracing of what I have been taught by the spirits around me, I have learnt to love myself more, and not less, because of these illnesses.

And it is also true that because of them, I think I am able to offer certain insights that others who have not been through them, cannot. I can never undo the crimes that were inflicted upon me, but I can learn from them, take responsibility for my healing, and share what I have learned with others. While I seek health and wellness, I also see how my wounds - both those visible and those beneath the surface - have become a tool in my shamanism to work great healings on behalf of myself, and others.

These ramblings today are brought to you by my illnesses, for alongside my chronic illnesses, my mental disorders, the fact that I need a tooth removed, I also seem to be struck down with food poisoning. And it got me thinking that in the past I used to vilify myself when I was sick. I hated that I couldn't make offerings to the spirits, drum or even journey properly. I hated how out of touch I felt. I even thought, years ago, that it made me a 'bad shamanist' to be sick.

And nowadays it's the opposite. I recognise illness for what it is - a transient state that has the potential to teach me great things on the path to wellness - and accept that illness, when approached from certain mindsets, can provide their own spiritual truths and knowledges. So now I rest easily without self-vilification, because it is through taking care of myself, taking care of my body, and being gentle with myself in ways that other people in my life were not; that I am more spiritual, than if I were to force myself to drum or make offerings.

And it is through my illnesses that I have come to understand the nature of wellness, why it is desirable to achieve, and why we walk the paths to it that we do.

Comments

[lupabitch.livejournal.com]

One does not need to be sick, or dying, or to have died, or whatever, in order to be a shamanist.

THANK YOU. There's a certain subset of nonindigenous shamans who will give you the hairy eyeball if you haven't suffered terribly for your shamanism (if it's too easy, YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG)--never mind how effective the individual practice may be, with or without close brushes with death.

I mean, for me, what purpose would there be in nearly dying, if near-death is supposed to help with working with the dead (or almost dead)? I work with A) nature spirits, including those that are encased in very alive physical forms, and B) healing the human mind.

[moonvoice.livejournal.com]

The thing is, even if one hasn't been through all those things, shamanism is NOT easy for anyone to learn. It is outright challenging. So people who go 'you need to be sick / have died, otherwise it's too easy,' need to take a pill, because they might be understanding exactly how challenging it can be to commit to this path. I mean considering you came to shamanism from a place of relative wellness, I doubt you'd say it's been 'too easy' because of that! :)

A person who is sick may be more prepared for some things, but the same can be said of a person who is well.

[lupabitch.livejournal.com]

I suppose all the hashing out of my brain-meats and the mind in it that I've had to do over the years would count as "sickness"--never was formally diagnosed with anything, but there have certainly been times when I haven't been well. OTOH, going to grad school for a psych degree has been one of the most difficult things I've done, and that's been specifically for the shamanism I practice.

But I also need to check myself when I start writing paragraphs like the above, because then it feels like I'm justifying myself to others (and perhaps to myself).

[weishaupt.livejournal.com]

I thought the dying and rebirth thing was universal, part of the very definition of what is shamanism and what isn't. At least according the Mircea Eliade.

They aren't kidding when they say the most valuable wisdom comes through suffering. One needs to work with that suffering, though and find out what it needs to teach you, rather than just curse the darkness.

I think there is a close link between love of nature and being able to truly love and understand one's own nature. At least if it isn't just romanticism. I tend to get more into the nature stuff when I need to be 'grounded', and over-intellectual aspects of other parts of my eclectic path aren't really teaching me 'down there on the board'.

Just random thoughts, not really agreeing or disagreeing with anything here...

[opalblack.livejournal.com]

There's an equally erroneous flipside belief that many hold, that if you get ill you will become a shaman. That everyone who has a great illness, deep wound, close brush with death, etc. turns into a shaman, as if such automatically transubstantiate gross humanity into refined shamanity. There's some kind of akashic upload implied as well, that you recover just knowing everything about how to be a shaman without having to learn or be taught. And also, you will be a really good and wise person, and not a douchebag at all.

Anyone of whom all of these things are not simultaneously completely true is obviously still healing, and can look forward to them in the future when their healing is complete.

My. Arse.

[vanirpriestess.livejournal.com]

I'm going to second the THANK YOU. Holy crap, thank you.

I'm a priest, which is different than shamanism, but the Wounded Healer archetype is there, too.

The thing is, which I think you'll agree with me here, is that having a profound brush with death, physical or mental illnes/ses, major trauma, may make shamans and priests out of some people and may seriously just fuck some others up. Most people I know who have gone through shit are not thinking about Higher Powers and their place in the Multiverse, they are trying to spend another 24 hours not killing themselves.

When a person who is severely wounded gets put on a specific path, particularly a shamanic path, they cannot serve others if they stay stuck in the pain and agony and think that's all there is. Everyone is entitled to moments of anger and fear and just plain suck. I go there, you go there, everyone goes there. The difference is you are proactive about your personal healing. You see shamanism as a tool for healing, not something the Gods forced you to do because They hate you and want your life to suck and that of everyone else around you.

While walking the razor's edge of death may give people like you and myself a profound insight into human nature and healing that does not mean we deserved what happened to us, does not mean we are fucking martyrs or Bodhisattvas who should have to suffer for humanity, does not mean it should have happened, period, full stop. We may not be able to change the past, but glorifying what happened to us as the key to enlightenment is unfair to us and to others. And I know you get that, and I'm really glad you made this post, because there's some people who shall remain nameless who don't get that and in their teachings are fucking up people's heads and people's lives as a result.

In short... You have used your wounds as a way to heal and bring others healing, but you recognize that healing is necessary. Many don't, and lose the whole point...

[moonvoice.livejournal.com]

Mircea Eliade, while I have respect for his works, only studied certain cultures and didn't include all shamanic cultures in his studies (understandably, for no one could).

While suffering is universal, that doesn't mean that everyone is automatically a shaman for suffering. And likewise, experiences of joy are universal, and that doesn't automatically rule out joyful or healthy people from becoming shamans.

[moonvoice.livejournal.com]

There's an equally erroneous flipside belief that many hold, that if you get ill you will become a shaman.

I thankfully don't see this one as much these days, but I have encountered it. That those who are ill or sick automatically feel entitled to claim statuses that are not theirs to claim; or that they feel they suddenly have a great deal of shamanic wisdom. Pfft.

Most people don't acquire spiritual wisdom from illness, most people just rush to eliminate those illnesses. Or worse, some people even choose to wallow in their illnesses, thinking that is somehow a wise thing to do. :/

[weishaupt.livejournal.com]

True, Mircea didn't study every culture in existence.

I didn't say everyone who suffers is a shaman. That would be ridiculous. I said 'One needs to work with that suffering, though and find out what it needs to teach you', and even in that I'm not saying anything about shamanism. These were just remarks on everyday existence that can be used to grasp how a death-and-rebirth experience forms part of many types of initiation.

Life is an initation. However, it's true that the joys as well as the sufferings initiate us. I suspect people tend no to become introspective and 'oh why did this happen to me' when everything is just plummy, though ;p

[moonvoice.livejournal.com]

The thing is, which I think you'll agree with me here, is that having a profound brush with death, physical or mental illnes/ses, major trauma, may make shamans and priests out of some people and may seriously just fuck some others up.

I absolutely agree with this. In The World of Shamanism by Roger Walsh, the line between genuine mental illness and shamanism is explored, and the fact remains that the difference is that most people with serious illness don't ever approach a spiritual place with it. And certainly not a place within shamanism / priesthood.

they cannot serve others if they stay stuck in the pain and agony and think that's all there is.

No, because then the only thing they'd have to teach others, is how to find the value in pain, illness and sickness; instead of how to also nurture and nourish the value in wellness, health, and absence-of-pain.

I would never tell a client who hadn't been through rape, that they needed to be raped to find 'true wellness.' I would never tell someone who hadn't been violated, that only through violation could they understand purity. It's a farce. And to glorify suffering is to lose sight of the whole picture.

[moonvoice.livejournal.com]

I said 'One needs to work with that suffering, though and find out what it needs to teach you', and even in that I'm not saying anything about shamanism.

I agree with that in general, it's just some people mistake that for 'it's good to glorify suffering over all other experiences, especially if I want to know enlightenment.' And then apply that to shamanism. :/

And that to me is a huge step backwards, in this thing called life.

[weishaupt.livejournal.com]

Yep, one should learn from all experiences. I think the glorification of learning from suffering, and even imposing suffering on oneself to do so is what turns me off so much about Gurdjieff. Maybe he was just a Georgian immigrant who loved getting middle class people to dig his wells for him. hahaha.

[liondaughter.livejournal.com]

No, because then the only thing they'd have to teach others, is how to find the value in pain, illness and sickness; instead of how to also nurture and nourish the value in wellness, health, and absence-of-pain.

And also because you cannot guide another to a place that you yourself don't know how to get to and are afraid to even try to get to.. That's something I had to face in my own healing. I had to "man up" and do it because otherwise I'd be a shitty psychiatrist. Or maybe a mediocre psychiatrist, but not a healer. Not the psychiatrist I wanted to be and have the potential to be.

[mutantenemy.livejournal.com]

Another one to say THANK YOU.

I have lived a blessed life. It's not been perfect, but it has not been a perfect hell either. I've not suffered through any chronic illnesses, I've not had a brush with Death (thought I have sat beside Death and watched it take a loved one), nor am I diagnosed with any physical or mental disorders.

Having said that, it does NOT mean I have not had my share of heartaches and hard lessons. I've always found it bothersome (and rather annoying) how some in the community look down upon a person like me who has not "suffered for their spirituality". Just because I'm not diagnosed with fibromalgia or bipolar disorder or what have you does not make me less than a shamanist than them.

/two cents

[nachtrabe.livejournal.com]

To echo Lupa--thank you thank you thank you for writing that. It is desperately needed to be understood that sickness can be [i]a[/i] method of learning and initiation for the self, but is not the only one.

May I provide a link to this from Hranfspeil (http://hrafnspeil.blogspot.com/)?

[vanirpriestess.livejournal.com]

There also seems to be some folks - not you, obviously - who will use the idea of becoming shamanic as an escape from reality or an excuse not to deal with their shit. I have seen a lot of this in certain circles and why I've become a lot more reserved with who I discuss any mystical anything with. It is completely possible to be genuinely God/spirit-touched and genuinely nuts, it is also the case that not every person who goes through (X Fucked-Up Experience) is going to become a shaman.

Glorification of suffering is insulting to the work of real shamanists and those they serve. I again thank you that you get this.

[aleia-kali.livejournal.com]

A very wise and positive post, thank you for sharing it. *hugs*

[saevor.livejournal.com]

Yes, thank you again. There are a lot of ways to approach healing and shamanistic technics or practices, not only the suffering/illness one. I think that there could be people shamanic-oriented that could think that they are doing wrong because others tell them that they need to die or be ill to be one of them (or suffer on other ways), so writings like this are very needed out there ^_^.

[tsukikokoro.livejournal.com]

While illness, physical distress and near death experiences are not required to become a shaman in neoshamanism (are there cultures where it is?), does the potential shaman still need to go through initiations? What kind of initiations are most appropriate?

I also remember the Journeying book mentioning that many shamans in indigenous cultures are some of the most mentally stable, even after having been through potentially traumatic experiences. The idea that a shaman has to have been very sick at some point has also backfired on the perception of those in the community. I've run into the attitude that no sane person would be in a neoshaman community, and they point out how many of the members suffer from mental or chronic physical illnesses. The attitude angers me, but when some of the community insists a person must bear this burden to be "qualified" to be so spiritually connected, I can see how outsiders would come to that conclusion. :-/

[moonvoice.livejournal.com]

And also because you cannot guide another to a place that you yourself don't know how to get to and are afraid to even try to get to..

*nods*

You can't be a good, or wise healer and be too afraid to heal, or see what's on the other side of suffering and illness. Sure, there are some things that can't be conquered - I may be on iron transfusions for the rest of my life - but it is the spirit of wellness, the acceptance of what is 'health' for the self, that matters.

And so many are scared of what that is, what it means, and what they may have to give up to get there. :/

[moonvoice.livejournal.com]

Glorification of suffering is insulting to the work of real shamanists and those they serve.

I agree with this. Absolutely. It not only devalues the suffering itself (glorification of a thing at the expense of others, can show a lack of understanding of the thing being glorified); but takes the focus away from spirituality and healing, into a toxic, unhealthy place.

[moonvoice.livejournal.com]

Having said that, it does NOT mean I have not had my share of heartaches and hard lessons.

Well said. I try and keep my essays in this series short, but one thing I absolutely believe in - is that even if you come at your spirituality from a relatively healthy and well place, there will still be sadness, suffering, and challenge.

It's the way of the world. There's no reason to go seeking serious 'shamanic illness', because every person's life will have its heartaches and challenges.

You mention that it sucks to be looked down upon for not having 'suffered for your spirituality.' On the flipside, it also sucks to be looked down upon for having 'spirituality derived from mental illness.'

The haters will find a reason no matter what.

[moonvoice.livejournal.com]

May I provide a link to this from Hranfspeil?

Sure, I'd be honoured. :)

[moonvoice.livejournal.com]

*hugs* Thank you for reading it!

[moonvoice.livejournal.com]

I think that there could be people shamanic-oriented that could think that they are doing wrong because others tell them that they need to die or be ill to be one of them

There are people out there who sadly feel like this. And it is a very sad thing, because it's just not necessary to die or go through extreme illness to become a neo-shamanist.

Certainly it's common. I know more serious shamanists who have a history of illness, rather than a history of wellness; but that doesn't mean it's universal.

[moonvoice.livejournal.com]

While illness, physical distress and near death experiences are not required to become a shaman in neoshamanism (are there cultures where it is?)

There are cultures where it is required. And Indigenous cultures where it is not required. The joy of culture is that it is so diverse. So it's problematic when anthropologists have mistakenly tried to unify the 'shamanic' experience by claiming a universality of the shaman's illness to the exclusion of other shamanic cultures...

does the potential shaman still need to go through initiations? What kind of initiations are most appropriate?

I think initiation is fairly fundamental to a shamanic experience, but then I think initiation is fundamental to the human experience in general. Apply yourself in a dedicated way to anything - relationships, a job, your psychology, a religion; and you're going to have a few initiatory experiences.

As to the types of initiation that would be most appropriate? No idea. I've had a 'come back from the dead' initiation experience, and while it taught me a bit, it didn't teach me nearly as much as the years of hard work that followed. I guess it just helped me reach a different plateau. I suppose in that sense, initiations are useless without the hard work that precedes and follows them.

[mutantenemy.livejournal.com]

The haters will find a reason no matter what.

No truer words spoken.

[liondaughter.livejournal.com]

Yeah, and there's a lot of responsibility that comes with being there and that's scary too. That's the big reason why I fought it for as long as I did.

[liondaughter.livejournal.com]

I saw something today that said, "Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional." I will be thinking on that for a while, I think. I'm not sure I'm 100% on board with it, but there is truth within it.

[liondaughter.livejournal.com]

The attitude angers me, but when some of the community insists a person must bear this burden to be "qualified" to be so spiritually connected, I can see how outsiders would come to that conclusion. :-/

Ugh, I really hate that. Because what that does is tell people that if they heal, they will no longer be accepted by their community. And that is the ANTITHESIS of what any good healer should be saying/doing. They have to stay sick or lose their "street cred" as well as their friends. It's awful, unkind, counter productive and unnecessary.

There are a lot of support groups, especially for trauma survivors, out there that are like that too. They foster people holding onto to their pain in order to be accepted within the group. Caroline Myss calls it "woundology", I think.

[dragonsrmd.livejournal.com]

One word occurred to me after reading this and that was *empathy* Experiencing trauma in life can make you empathic to the trauma of others, but you don't have to experience trauma in order to empathize.

Where I work a great many of the staff there have had their own *life experiences* and can draw upon them to help and support the patients there, however there are some who are there because they want to help and whilst they lack the same *life experiences* as the others they still have compassion and the desire to help.

Basically I agree with you, and I wish that I could be more eloquent on the subject but I'm currently between night shifts and most of my brain cells are *blegh!*

Blessed be :)

[hazey-sunshine.livejournal.com]

It's nice to hear someone going against the grain and saying it isn't necessary to have died.

[moonvoice.livejournal.com]

Hey I got what you're saying, so it's eloquent enough for me.

I even sometimes wonder if it's only empathy. Working on my own stuff has actually made me less empathetic (one of my problems as a teenager was giving away too much energy to others at the expense of myself), but I think more... fundamentally understanding of how trauma itself works on the mind and body. And while empathy is an amazing, valid, necessary tool... that detached, logical understanding I have of trauma, even as a shamanist, is also invaluable.

A person with only empathy, dealing with a trauma victim, can do more harm than good - I know, because I've experienced it from therapists who let their empathy cause boundary violations, and smothering. :/

Does that make any sense?

And definitely, there are people without those 'life experiences' as you delicately put it, who are just as capable of showing that understanding, compassion and empathy. :)

[moonvoice.livejournal.com]

It's nice to hear someone going against the grain and saying it isn't necessary to have died.

There's a lot of us out there! But... I guess not getting our message out enough. :)

[moonvoice.livejournal.com]

I suppose it depends on the definition of both. Suffering can be very valuable, but I'm not sure if it's optional really - unless you're an autonomous adult with a mature understanding of emotional choice.

Imho, the suffering I experienced as a child... I don't think that was 'optional.'

[liondaughter.livejournal.com]

Right, which is why I am not 100% on board. It's only optional insofar as you have some measure of control over your own situation (the ability to make choices) and an understanding of the power of choice.

[moonvoice.livejournal.com]

And even then, sometimes it's gonna be 'suffering' as a conscious choice. I mean look at my loss-work, that's embracing my pain and experiencing suffering as a way of processing it. So I chose suffering, essentially.

Would choosing to 'bypass' it ever have been successful? Could the choice to ignore that suffering or just 'disappear' it, be a healthy choice in that instance?

[liondaughter.livejournal.com]

No, it wouldn't at all. But I guess I wasn't looking at it that way. There seems to be a qualitative difference between the suffering of moving through and the suffering of stagnancy.

That's another problem I had with The Secret actually. I think stored and ignored trauma would flummox a lot of the attracting. Because if a good chunk of yourself is dissociated away and in pain, that piece is attracting too. And that has to be processed rather than ignored and glossed over.

[moonvoice.livejournal.com]

And yet, the sad thing is, The Secret is touted as a philosophy that - if you adopt it - you can overcome the pain in your life (and theoretically the trauma), but it just wouldn't be possible.

[liondaughter.livejournal.com]

Not the way they're promoting it, no. I mean the tools would still be useful, but the overall framework needs adjusting.

[copperbeech.livejournal.com]

i love this!

[dragonsrmd.livejournal.com]

I agree completely with the boundary issues and like anything in life it's about finding the right balance. I guess the ability to empathize, balanced with the ability analyze the *technical* aspects of the situation are what's needed.

Too much empathy and it becomes about the person trying to *help* I've been on this side of the experience too, and know how much it can invalidate anything you're feeling. I can only hope that in my job I've found the balance needed, and maybe it's the awareness of the of the need for that balance as well that helps us strive to be better at what we do :)

[alfrecht.livejournal.com]

I wouldn't call myself a shaman or a shamanist (though others have), but I've certainly had the chronic illness, NDE (more than I'd like to count, actually), and other things associated with this. The shamanic paradigm did give me a lot to think about and better avenues toward self-understanding and integration than any other religious path I encountered at the time when I needed it most (age 15-16, 10th grade in high school), and in fact I just had some major things I remembered from that period, which I'll be posting about in the near future...But, yes, because of those experiences (which continue today), and finding out about shamanism/the shamanic paradigm at the right moment, I ended up getting into neopaganism; and while I didn't do the shamanic thing "full-time," as it were, as my main calling or working methodology, it has certainly been a contributing factor in the overall constellation.

But, yes. Much food for thought...

[zeeth_kyrah]

Initiations are a doorway experience; you have to walk up to the door, and there are places to go once you've been through. But passing through the door (or gate) allows one stage of your experience to close, while opening the way to the next.

[layo.livejournal.com]

There's a lot of one-upsmanship abut suffering in the consciousness community (my umbrella term for people who work with spirits and/or the deeper levels of mind) as a whole, including the new age end. All in all, I find it bullying at the worst end and territorial posturing otherwise. When I first got interested in this stuff, I was pretty unmarked and felt insecure about it. Now that I've suffered I have gained no cred, many insights I doubt I needed to go through all that to get, and a certain stigma for having been victimized as an adult rather than a child. In short, I think those folks are wrong, and that glamorizing pain endangers those who believe them.

[qilora.livejournal.com]

i def. want to discuss this *big* with you (relating to my recently getting sick)... not sure if i want to write you email here or make a post about it, have to think first....

[sa-hall.livejournal.com]

I agree that the idea of the wounded healer is overstated. I think that learning the techniques of shamanic journeying could benefit everyone. But it can be very helpful specifically for people with chronic pain. I wish our society did not put up barriers of fear that prevent more people who are in pain from using Shamanic journeying as one technique, among others, for managing pain.

I know with certainty that I was drawn to core shamanism because of my illness. I know that it is helpful to me. I don't think that experience necessarily makes me a healer of others, though. If that is a goal, it takes work.

I also don't buy into the idea that my chronic illness was somehow "meant to be" or makes me something special. A person can learn the lessons of illness and pain in a month or perhaps a few months. A person don't have to be in pain for the rest of their life to learn something. And learning something from it does not magically make a person well. Some folks bring an expectation of miraculous cures to shamanism, which is not beneficial to people with chronic illness (I get that from society in general, not just within shamanism: "gee what if you just take this supplement, it will all go away").

I accept my illness. Shamanic journeying helps. Personally, I find meaning in shamanism, but not meaning in illness.

Thanks for your post

[moonvoice.livejournal.com]

I think that learning the techniques of shamanic journeying could benefit everyone.

I don't think journeying is for everyone. I think it is far far too dangerous and unsafe for everyone to be able to pick it up as a life-skill. I would no sooner recommend everyone journey, as I would recommend everyone be a surgeon.

It's a combination of a complex series of skills, and outside of core shamanism (and even within core shamanism, depending on the practicioner), every shamanic Indigenous culture that I've researched (which numbers well over 100 now) recognises that it's not safe; and that the costs and risks are high.

I do, however, think more people could learn to journey, and would definitely benefit from it as a practice. I also think those who can journey should be more willing to accept the mantle of responsibility that comes with acquiring such a skill; in order to help and perform soul healing / psychopomping for others.

But no, I personally think it would be terribly remiss if everyone was taught how to journey.

A person can learn the lessons of illness and pain in a month or perhaps a few months.

I think this is an assumptive statement. Unless you are everyone; you cannot possibly know how long it will take them to learn something.

I know that I personally was still learning amazing, life-changing things from chronic pain a year and a half after I'd attained it. And I know that if I still had chronic pain, I'd still be learning those things. There is another person on my Flist who has chronic fibromyalgia who learns significant things every few months or so. Maybe we are slow learners, but we are examples that show that your assumptive statement is flawed. After all, a lot of people are 'slow learners.' :) And it doesn't mean that the pain is special; only that we are amazing spiritual creatures to be able to attain new wisdom from something we've had from some time.

I've often thought, myself, that people who think they've learnt everything they need to learn from something in a month or so; are often just displaying how much more they need to learn from it. As it is often never truly possible to completely know or understand anything. To assume complete knowledge from any state - love, anger, illess, wellness etc. is to display the knowledge one doesn't have.